Toddlers are naturally curious and full of energy, making it challenging to grab their attention or ensure they follow instructions. Instead of resorting to frustration, using specific phrases can encourage cooperation and help guide them gently. Here are 15 effective phrases to use when your toddler isn’t listening.
1. “I need your help with something.”
Instead of giving a command, involve your toddler by making them feel important.
Why It Works
Toddlers love to feel useful, and this phrase sparks curiosity and cooperation.
2. “Let’s do this together!”
Encourage teamwork to make tasks less intimidating or boring for your child.
Why It Works
It shifts focus from “I have to” to “We’re doing this together,” fostering bonding and compliance.
3. “Can you show me how fast you can do it?”
Turn tasks into a game by appealing to their competitive or playful side.
Why It Works
It motivates them to act quickly while feeling accomplished.
4. “What’s your plan?”
This phrase encourages your toddler to think about their actions and make choices.
Why It Works
It gives them a sense of control, making them more willing to follow through.
5. “Do you want to do this first or that first?”
Offer limited choices to help your toddler feel in charge while staying on track.
Why It Works
It reduces power struggles by giving them a say in how things are done.
6. “Let’s try again together.”
When your toddler resists, use this phrase to redirect them without criticism.
Why It Works
It emphasizes teamwork and second chances, reducing tension.
7. “I see you’re upset. How can I help?”
Acknowledge their feelings before addressing the issue.
Why It Works
It validates their emotions and creates a calmer environment for cooperation.
8. “When you’re ready, let me know.”
This phrase gives them space to process your request without feeling pressured.
Why It Works
Toddlers often respond better when they don’t feel rushed or forced.
9. “I’ll wait until you’re ready.”
Set a calm tone by showing patience while maintaining firm expectations.
Why It Works
It signals respect for their pace, encouraging a quicker response.
10. “Can you show me how you do it?”
Ask your toddler to demonstrate their approach to a task or behavior.
Why It Works
It turns resistance into an opportunity for them to showcase their abilities.
11. “What comes next?”
Use this phrase to involve them in problem-solving or routines.
Why It Works
It helps toddlers recall expectations and feel like active participants.
12. “Let’s take a break and try again.”
When emotions run high, offer a reset instead of pushing further.
Why It Works
It prevents escalation and teaches healthy ways to manage frustration.
13. “We’re on the same team!”
Reinforce the idea that you’re working toward the same goal.
Why It Works
It reduces the feeling of opposition and fosters cooperation.
14. “Can you use your big kid voice to tell me what you need?”
Encourage communication over tantrums or resistance.
Why It Works
It teaches your toddler to express themselves calmly and clearly.
15. “Thank you for listening!”
Always end on a positive note by reinforcing good behavior.
Why It Works
Positive reinforcement encourages your toddler to listen again in the future.
Conclusion
Toddlers don’t intentionally ignore—they’re often overwhelmed by their emotions or focused on their world. Using these 15 phrases helps redirect their attention positively while fostering communication and understanding. Patience and consistency are key as you guide them through these developmental years.
