But here’s the thing: labour doesn’t always start the way the movies show it. No dramatic gasp in the grocery store, no mad dash to the hospital after your water suddenly breaks. Often, your body gives you quiet little whispers that your baby’s debut is near — and I’m here, as a mama who’s gone through it twice, to share them with you.

So let’s walk through this timeline together from a few weeks out to those exciting final hours so you can feel calm, prepared, and a little giddy about what’s coming next.

2–4 Weeks Before Labour: The Early Hints

1. Your Baby “Drops” Into Position

One day you might realise your belly looks a little lower. That’s your baby settling into your pelvis, we call it lightening. You might breathe easier (hello, more lung space!), but you’ll also find yourself visiting the bathroom more than you thought humanly possible. With my first baby, I remember thinking, “Oh, this is it!”… but she still took her sweet time arriving.

2. Braxton Hicks Contractions Feel More Noticeable

These little “practice contractions” are like your uterus doing warm-up stretches. They’re usually irregular and go away if you rest or drink water. In my second pregnancy, I had them almost every evening for weeks. It was like my body’s nightly reminder that something big was coming.

1–2 Weeks Before Labour: Nesting & Body Changes

3. The Nesting Instinct Hits Hard

If you suddenly feel like reorganising your pantry at midnight or folding tiny onesies for the fifth time, welcome to nesting. It’s this burst of energy that almost feels magical your way of preparing the perfect space for your little one.

4. Loose Joints and Backache

Your body’s producing relaxin, a hormone that loosens ligaments in your pelvis so your baby can pass through more easily. The downside? Your hips might ache, your walk might get wobblier, and turning in bed might feel like a slow-motion sport.

A Few Days Before Labour: The Signs Get Stronger

5. Losing Your Mucus Plug

This jelly-like plug has been sealing your cervix all pregnancy to keep bacteria out. As your cervix starts to soften and open, it comes out either in one piece or little bits over days. It’s completely normal and just another sign your body is making room for your baby.

6. Stomach Upset or Diarrhoea

Not the most glamorous part, but your digestive system may “clear out” before labour. It’s your body’s way of making sure there’s nothing in the way when the time comes.

Within 24–48 Hours: The Countdown is Real

7. The Bloody Show

A small amount of pink or brown mucus means your cervix is opening more. I remember seeing it with my second baby and thinking, “Okay, we’re really close now.”

8. Heavier Pelvic Pressure & Backache

Your baby’s head presses down so low you might feel like you’re carrying a bowling ball between your legs. Even sitting can feel different at this stage everything feels ready.

Hours Before Labour: The Big Moment

9. Your Water Breaks

Sometimes it’s a gush, sometimes it’s a trickle and sometimes it doesn’t happen until you’re well into contractions. Either way, it’s one of those oh wow moments where you know things are moving fast.

10. Contractions That Don’t Let Up

Real labour contractions are strong, rhythmic, and they get closer together no matter what you do. When they take your breath away and you can’t talk through them, you know you’re about to meet your baby.

Mama, you’ve got this.
Every twinge, every ache, every exciting sign is your body’s way of telling you: “We’re almost there.” The wait may have felt endless, but soon you’ll hold that little bundle you’ve been dreaming about for nine whole months and all the discomfort will fade into the background the moment you hear that first cry.

Frequently Asked Questions About Signs of Labour

Q1: Can labour start without losing the mucus plug?
Yes! Some mamas never notice when they lose it, and labour still starts just fine. It can also come out during active labour, so don’t panic if you haven’t seen it yet.

Q2: How do I know if it’s real labour or just Braxton Hicks?
Real labour contractions get stronger, last longer, and come closer together and they don’t stop when you rest or drink water. Braxton Hicks are usually irregular and fade away with a change in activity.

Q3: What should I do if my water breaks first?
Call your healthcare provider, even if contractions haven’t started yet. Sometimes labour kicks in right away, and sometimes it takes a few hours. Either way, they’ll guide you on when to head in.

Q4: Is it normal to feel emotional before labour?
Absolutely. Those final days are a mix of excitement, nervousness, and impatience. Your hormones are shifting, and you’re about to meet your baby .It’s a lot! Be gentle with yourself.

Q5: Should I rush to the hospital as soon as I notice signs?
Not necessarily. Most providers suggest the “5-1-1” rule for first-time mamas: contractions are 5 minutes apart, lasting 1 minute each, for at least 1 hour. But if you’re unsure or feel uneasy, call your provider anytime.

The post 10 Unexpected Signs Labour is Closer Than You Think (From One Mama to Another) appeared first on Pregnancy+Parenting.

A single mother has long since learned that no one else will come along to take these tasks from her. And so, another day begins—sustained not by rest, but by necessity.

She appears strong. Organized. In control. Almost unshakable. But this strength isn’t a choice—it’s a necessity. A mask she wears because there is no alternative.

Strength as Survival Mode

Many single mothers live in a constant state of “functioning.” It’s not a decision—it’s a survival mechanism.

Because who will cook if she doesn’t?
Who will help with homework when she’s exhausted?
Who will earn the money, pay the bills, do the shopping, and take the child to the dentist?

She shoulders all of these responsibilities, often without support. And even when she’s sick—even when every part of her is screaming for rest—she gets up. Every single day. Without a backup. Without a break. Without a safety net.

This kind of strength is often admired, sometimes even idealized. But few see the cost: lack of sleep, inner emptiness, emotional exhaustion—and the slow erosion of her own identity.

When Everyday Life Becomes an Endurance Test

The schedule is relentless: get up, care for the children, rush to work, shop for groceries, cook dinner, oversee homework, do laundry, settle disputes, and coordinate appointments.

No moment of silence. No space for herself.

And then, when the house is finally quiet at night, the carousel of thoughts begins:

“Was I too impatient today?”
“Did I show enough love?”
“How long can I keep this up?”

In those quiet moments, the single mother often feels more alone than ever.
No one asks, “How are you?”
No one sees the tears she holds back to appear strong.
No one notices the inner battle she fights every single day—with herself, with the world, with her fears.

Guilt as a Constant Companion

One of the heaviest burdens many single mothers carry is guilt.

Guilt that they can’t give their children enough—enough time, enough patience, enough stability.
Guilt that sometimes they simply don’t have the strength. That they long for peace. That they feel their own limits.

This guilt seeps in quietly. It drains energy. It stops mothers from caring for themselves.

Because how can you take time for yourself when you feel you’re already failing your children?

Pressure from the Outside

As if the internal pressure weren’t enough, there’s also pressure from outside:

“Did you choose this?”
“Why don’t you find a new partner?”
“Do you even work enough?”

Questions like these reveal how little understanding there is of the complex reality of single motherhood.

Society’s expectations are contradictory:
Be loving but firm.
Be present but also successful in your career.
Be strong but not cold.
Be independent but not too outspoken.

This balancing act is exhausting—and often impossible without neglecting something, or someone.

Invisible Needs

Lost in all of this are the mother’s own needs.

When was the last time she drank a cup of tea without thinking about schedules?
When was the last time she laughed without worrying about tomorrow?

Many single mothers keep going long after their batteries are empty.
They push aside their desires. Postpone their dreams. Ignore the warning signs from their bodies.

Because they believe they have no choice.
Because they’ve learned they must be strong.

But in the long run, self-sacrifice leads to burnout—and often to physical or mental illness.

When Help Is Missing—or Refused

Here’s the paradox: Many single mothers desperately need help but hesitate to accept it.

They fear being judged as incapable or seen as weak.
They don’t want to be a burden.
So they push on. Day after day. Until they simply can’t anymore.

The truth is, accepting help is not weakness—it’s courage.

Whether it’s from friends, family, neighbors, or professionals, no one should have to carry this weight alone.

What Needs to Change

Single mothers need more than admiration. They need real, structural support:

• Affordable, flexible childcare

• Family-friendly working hours

• Financial assistance

• Networks for genuine connection and support

They need safe spaces to speak openly without judgment.
They need media that portrays their reality honestly—not through stereotypes.
They need communities that offer help, not just advice.

You’re Allowed…

If you see yourself in these words, remember this:
You’re allowed to be tired.
You’re allowed to be angry.
You’re allowed to not be strong sometimes.

You are doing your best—and that is enough.

Your children don’t need a perfect mother. They need a real one. One who loves them, who shows up, and who can also say, “I can’t do this right now.”

Because true strength isn’t in constant functioning—it’s in the courage to take yourself seriously. To rest. To accept help. To say, “I am more than a mother. I am also a human being.”

Conclusion:

When strength becomes an obligation, there must still be room for humanity.

Single mothers live in the space between self-sacrifice and duty, between resilience and exhaustion.

It’s time for their voices to be heard, their feelings acknowledged, and their needs respected.

Because no one should have to be strong alone. And every mother deserves the chance to keep herself intact.

The post Single Mother – When Strength Becomes A Duty appeared first on Pregnancy+Parenting.

You know what you’re doing, but everything still feels a bit strange and out of place. A single mother with a daughter may find some comfort and confidence in the familiar (though it can still be intimidating at times).

After my divorce, I thought a lot about how boys play, how they discover their bodies, and how they learn to navigate the world. I wondered how I could help them become good young men. I worried that they might be at a disadvantage because—even though they spend half their time with their father—I am not a man.

But a single mother raising a son is fully capable of doing an amazing job.

It simply takes intentional words and actions. Here are 7 things you can do to raise a great boy as a single mom:

1. Be supportive and warm

Simplify your parenting strategy by focusing on two key things: being supportive and being warm.

Studies show that children whose mothers display these qualities tend to be not only more successful, but also happier.

So, hug your boys often, cheer the loudest at their games, listen when they speak, pray for them, and praise them generously.

2. Speak kindly about his father and encourage their relationship

Imagine this: After your son’s father cancels a trip (again), you vent out loud about how unreliable he is.

Later that same day, when your son does something clever, you say, “You’re just like your father,” thinking of his dad’s problem-solving skills.

Which trait will your son believe makes him like his father? Both.

That’s why it’s important to highlight the good qualities he shares with his father while keeping quiet about the bad ones.

And even if his father is unreliable, your son still needs time with him. A little flexibility in the schedule can make a big difference.

3. Find a physical activity you both enjoy

Boys need to move, and physical activity is a great way to bond with your son.

If you’re tired (and you probably are), throwing a soccer ball around might not sound appealing. But there are other options: bike rides, push-up contests, kayaking, hiking, or even golf.

Choose something you both enjoy, so it becomes a shared experience rather than another chore.

4. Don’t make him the man of the house

It’s hard for boys to grow into healthy young men if they’re forced to “be the man” too early.

Yes, children should learn responsibility, but if your son has to take on the emotional burden of running the household, it can slow his emotional development.

This is known as emotional parentification—when a child becomes the emotional support for a parent. Children should be able to lean on their parents, not the other way around. If a mother leans on her son for emotional stability, he may never truly find peace, because he’s carrying a weight that doesn’t belong to him.

5. Learn what makes boys tick

Boys often process and express emotions differently from girls. They may also show affection and attachment in different ways.

My 8-year-old no longer kisses me, and while it stung a little at first, I learned not to take it personally.

If you expect your son to always react the way he did when he was younger, one of you will quickly become frustrated.

6. Be prepared to leave your comfort zone

I would feel far more comfortable being a cheerleading coach than a Boy Scout den leader.

I’d rather teach a girl to shave her legs than a boy to trim facial hair.

But showing up for your son—even if you’re the only woman in a room full of fathers, or you have to pretend you know what you’re doing—proves to him that you’re willing to stretch yourself and make sacrifices because you love him.

7. Look for good male role models

Positive male figures can be found in movies, books, and scripture. Point out to your son when a man shows character and integrity.

But also, don’t underestimate the value of real-life role models—men who are willing to be present and model healthy masculinity.

It could be a neighbor who shoots hoops with him, an uncle who chats while fixing a tire, or a Scout leader who teaches about honesty and responsibility. These influences can help your son grow into a well-rounded, emotionally healthy man.

These aren’t the only ways single moms raise great boys—but they’re a strong foundation to start from. What would you add to this list?

The post Single Mom: 7 Things Single Moms Can Do To Raise Great Boys appeared first on Pregnancy+Parenting.

Not strong in the sense of being unshakable or perfect, but strong in being present, empathetic, and emotionally stable. She offers her child not only love, but also a deep sense of security and self-worth.

In a world where children face comparisons, expectations, and performance pressure from an early age, it is even more important that home remains a place where their worth is unconditional.

This is where a strong mother can make all the difference — by creating an environment in which the child feels fully accepted for who they are.

What Does “Strong” Really Mean?

Many people confuse strength with toughness. But a strong mother is not someone who never shows emotion or hides every weakness.

True strength lies in acknowledging her own insecurities, reflecting on herself, and still being able to offer her child support and stability.

In this sense, strength also means taking responsibility for her own emotional health.

Children can sense whether their mother is emotionally steady. A mother who can regulate her emotions naturally teaches her child how to manage their own feelings.

Unconditional Acceptance — The Foundation of a Healthy Self-Image

A child’s self-image is shaped primarily by feedback from their closest caregivers.

When a mother tells her child, “You are valuable, no matter what you do or achieve,” she lays the foundation for a stable sense of self.

Unconditional acceptance does not mean that everything is allowed or that there are no limits.

It means that a mother’s love for her child is not dependent on behavior. This allows the child to understand: “I am not my mistakes — I am allowed to learn from them.”

The Power of Being a Role Model

Children learn far more from what they observe than from what they are told.

A mother who treats herself with respect subconsciously teaches her child to do the same. When a child sees their mother take breaks, meet her own needs, and speak kindly to herself, they learn: “It’s okay to be good to myself.”

Conversely, a mother who constantly criticizes herself may unintentionally teach her child to adopt that same self-critical voice.

This is why self-care is not only important for the mother’s well-being, but also for the emotional legacy she passes on.

Communication — The Lasting Impact of Words

The way a mother speaks to her child directly affects their self-image. Praise is important, but it works best when it is specific and genuine.

Instead of saying, “You’re the best,” it’s more empowering to say, “I’m proud of how hard you tried.”

The same applies to criticism. A strong mother separates behavior from identity: “What you did wasn’t right,” rather than “You’re impossible.”

This teaches the child that making mistakes doesn’t diminish their worth.

Emotional Security — A Safe Space to Grow

Children who know their feelings are taken seriously develop a healthy sense of self.

A strong mother listens without rushing to judge and sends the message: “Your feelings matter.” This also means creating space for sadness, frustration, or disappointment.

A child who learns that all emotions are valid will grow into an adult who can process and express feelings constructively — rather than suppressing or being ashamed of them.

Boundaries — Security Through Clarity

A healthy self-image doesn’t come from unlimited freedom, but from clear, loving boundaries.

A strong mother says “no” when needed and remains consistent without damaging the relationship.

Boundaries give children a sense of safety and structure. They learn: “I matter enough for someone to care for and guide me.”

Encouragement Without Pressure

A strong mother recognizes her child’s talents and interests without forcing them in a certain direction. She encourages them to try new things, but respects their limits.

This builds self-confidence without creating the feeling that they must always be perfect. “I believe you can do this” inspires; “You have to do this” pressures.

Turning Mistakes Into Lessons

Mistakes are a natural part of growth. A strong mother teaches her child that failures are not defeats but opportunities to learn.

Instead of focusing on the failure, she asks: “What can you do differently next time?” This helps the child face challenges with resilience and a problem-solving mindset.

Building Self-Esteem Through Independence

A strong mother allows her child to make age-appropriate decisions, offering guidance without taking over. This strengthens their belief in their own abilities.

The more a child experiences that their opinion matters and that they can influence their own life, the more stable their self-image becomes.

This doesn’t mean leaving them alone — it means supporting them in their independence.

When the Mother Isn’t Always Strong

No one can be strong all the time. Mothers also go through phases of overwhelm, doubt, or sadness. What matters is how they handle these moments.

A mother who says, “I’m feeling exhausted right now, but I’m working on regaining my strength,” models a healthy way to handle challenges.

The child learns that strength is not the absence of problems, but the ability to face them.

The Long-Term Impact

Children who grow up in an environment of stability, acceptance, and encouragement carry these lessons into adulthood.

They are more likely to follow their own goals, build healthy relationships, and trust themselves — even in difficult situations.

A stable self-image acts as an inner compass, protecting them from negative outside influences and guiding them to make choices based on their own values.

Conclusion

A strong mother shapes her child’s self-image not through perfection, but through authenticity, consistency, and love.

She is a role model of self-respect, offers unconditional acceptance, sets clear boundaries, and encourages independence.

Her child learns: “I am valuable — just as I am.” And that belief becomes the foundation for a confident, fulfilling life.

The post A Strong Mother Creates A Healthy Self-image In The Child appeared first on Pregnancy+Parenting.

Be Strong When No One Else Is There

The everyday life of a single mother is filled with responsibilities. You make sure everything runs smoothly — from the school commute and doctor’s appointments to homework, dinner, and the nightly bedtime routine.

You are the one who gets up when the children need you, who comforts, encourages, and cheers them on. You do this day after day, often without anyone to help you or even say, “You’re doing great.”

This constant availability takes an incredible amount of energy. Few people truly see how much you do, how often you give of yourself. You are the calming anchor for your family — yet you rarely get a moment of calm for yourself.

The Quiet Burden of Loneliness

Even though you are always surrounded by your children, a deep loneliness can still creep in. You miss having another adult who understands you, listens to you, and supports you.

This loneliness often slips into the small breaks between tasks, into the quiet moments when you are left alone with your thoughts.

Many single mothers feel misunderstood — and at the same time, they sometimes feel ashamed for longing for support. But it is perfectly normal not to be strong all the time.

Doubts That Linger

Love and doubt often live side by side. You wonder if you’re giving enough, if you’re meeting expectations, if you’re making the right choices.

The truth is, you are already giving everything you have. Yet these doubts can still eat away at your spirit, making your exhaustion feel even heavier.

You are not alone in these thoughts. Many single mothers carry them silently every single day.

More Than Just a Role

You are not only the mother of your children — you are also a person with your own needs, desires, and dreams. Yet these often get buried beneath daily responsibilities, hidden behind a sense of duty and constant worry.

It’s important to give yourself space — space to rest, to feel joy, even if it seems difficult to find. Because only when you care for yourself can you fully be there for your children.

The Courage to Seek Help

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. On the contrary, it is an act of strength.

Surround yourself with people who understand and support you, who offer encouragement instead of judgment. This connection can give you new energy and ease the weight of loneliness.

Life is lighter when it’s shared — and the burden on your shoulders becomes a little smaller.

You Are Enough

To all single mothers: you are doing something extraordinary. Your love and commitment are the foundation of your family.

You are strong, even on the days you feel tired. And you are never truly alone on this journey.

Remember: you are more than the sum of your tasks. You are valuable just as you are — with all your strengths and all your imperfections.

The post Single Mother: Between Strength And Exhaustion appeared first on Pregnancy+Parenting.

While society sometimes paints a romanticized picture of the “strong woman who can do anything,” the reality is often far different — marked by exhaustion, insecurity, and the constant question of whether one is doing enough.

Everyday Life: A Constant Balancing Act

A single mother’s day often begins long before sunrise and ends only when the child (or children) are asleep — and even then, there is rarely any real rest.

There is so much to handle: preparing breakfast, locating school supplies, managing a hectic commute, doing your job as well as possible, helping with homework, making dinner, and putting the child to bed.

What many couples share between two people rests entirely on one set of shoulders. This means not only double the work, but also double the responsibility.

Every decision — from choosing a kindergarten to managing finances — must be made alone. This constant feeling of “I have to do it all by myself” is enormously stressful.

The Invisible Expectations of Society

Single mothers often feel pressure to be perfect — not only for their children, but also in the eyes of society.

The unspoken expectation is: work full-time, be financially independent, raise your child with love and consistency, keep the home spotless — and do it all with a smile.

These expectations are not only unrealistic but also unfair. They leave no room for vulnerability, no tolerance for mistakes, and no recognition for what has already been achieved.

Even the smallest deviation from this ideal often invites criticism — from family, friends, or even strangers.

Financial Worries: The Constant Companion

Money is a constant concern for many single mothers. One salary must cover rent, utilities, groceries, clothing, school supplies, extracurricular activities, and sometimes daycare fees.

On top of that come the unexpected costs: a broken washing machine, a school trip, or urgently needed winter coats.

Financial insecurity affects not only day-to-day life but also self-esteem. Some mothers feel as if they “can’t offer enough” to their children.

In truth, it is not the quantity of things purchased that matters, but the quality of time spent together — a thought often overshadowed by the daily stress of making ends meet.

The Emotional Double Role

A single mother must often be protector, comforter, playmate, teacher, and disciplinarian — all at once.

She has to show love while also setting boundaries, without a partner to share these roles.

This emotional duality can be exhausting. On days when patience runs thin or worries become overwhelming, many mothers are plagued by guilt.

They ask themselves, “Was I too strict today?” or “Was I present enough?” This constant self-questioning can be draining.

Loneliness: The Quiet Challenge

Beyond the visible struggles, there is a silent companion — loneliness.

When the children are asleep and the house falls quiet, there may be no one to share the day with, discuss problems, or simply sit beside in silence.

Friendships often change because spontaneity becomes nearly impossible. Invitations are declined because there’s no babysitter — or simply no energy left.

Many single mothers describe being surrounded by people all day — at work, at the playground, in the supermarket — yet still feeling alone.

The Inner Pressure to Be “Strong”

Single mothers often hear phrases like, “I admire how strong you are.” While well-intentioned, such words can add pressure.

Because what happens on the days when that strength falters?

Many mothers hide their exhaustion or sadness to avoid appearing “overwhelmed.” They present a brave face, while inside they may be on the verge of collapse.

Between Self-Sacrifice and Self-Care

In this context, “self-care” can feel like a luxury. Who has time for long baths, exercise, or quiet walks when there’s always something demanding attention?

Yet it is single mothers who most need moments to recharge.

This might mean accepting help — from family, friends, or professionals — and letting go of the belief that they must do everything alone.

Even small pauses, like consciously taking a few deep breaths or enjoying a quiet cup of coffee, can help lighten the load of everyday life.

The Relationship with the Children: Intense and Unique

Despite the challenges, the bond between single mothers and their children can be extraordinary.

The time spent together, the feeling of being a team, fosters a closeness that is often deep and enduring.

Children who watch their mothers overcome challenges learn resilience, responsibility, and empathy. While life is not always harmonious, these lessons last a lifetime.

Facing Prejudice

Sadly, prejudice against single mothers still exists.

Some assume a woman has “failed” simply because she is raising children without a partner. Others believe the children will inevitably suffer.

Such judgments are both hurtful and unfounded. Research shows that children thrive when they have love, security, and dependable care — regardless of whether that comes from one parent or two.

Recognizing Real Life

Between unrealistic expectations and the truth lies a gap that needs to be filled — with understanding, support, and genuine appreciation.

Society must create structures that ease the burden on single mothers: flexible work hours, affordable childcare, fair wages.

We also need a change in perspective: admiration should not be reserved for perfection, but for the courage to keep going each day — despite fatigue, worry, and self-doubt.

Conclusion

Single mothers navigate constantly between societal expectations and everyday reality. They achieve extraordinary things — often in silence, often without applause.

It’s time to see their reality, not just the idealized image. True strength is not in never stumbling, but in always getting back up.

The post Single Mother: Between Expectations And Real Life appeared first on Pregnancy+Parenting.

Daughters of self-centered mothers, in particular, experience this loneliness deeply and persistently. They often carry it with them throughout their lives—invisible to the outside world but palpable in every cell of their self-esteem.

These daughters learn early on: My needs don’t matter. They try to earn their mother’s love—through conformity, achievement, and consideration.

But no matter how hard they try, the feeling remains that they aren’t truly seen—because the center of the family system is not the child, but the mother.

What does “self-centered” mean?

A self-centered mother places—consciously or unconsciously—her own wishes, feelings, and perspectives above those of her child.

She expects attention, recognition, or emotional support without giving it back in kind.

Often, it is not about conscious cruelty, but about a deep-seated self-centeredness that leaves little room for others.

These mothers tend to see their daughter as an extension of themselves—not as an independent person with her own needs, boundaries, or opinions.

The child is needed to stabilize the mother’s self-image. She is expected to admire, comfort, function—and “disturb” as little as possible.

The early years: The lack of emotional resonance

A small child needs nothing more urgently than emotional mirroring: a loving look, genuine interest, a sensitive response to her feelings.

But in the relationship with a self-centered mother, this is precisely what is missing. The daughter may experience care, support, even affection—but not what nourishes her innermost being: to be seen, understood, and valued.

Instead, she learns to adapt. If she’s happy, she might be praised—but only if it fits her mother’s mood.

When she’s sad, she might hear phrases like, “Don’t exaggerate.” Or, “I’m not feeling well either—you’re always thinking about yourself.”

So the girl grows up with deep insecurity: Am I too much? Or not enough?

The daughter’s role: Functioning instead of feeling

To be loved, the daughter often takes on a role early on. She becomes the “good daughter,” the comforter, the helper.

She puts her own needs aside, learns to sense what her mother needs at any given moment—and adapts. Not out of weakness, but out of a childlike survival instinct. Because when her mother’s love is conditional, adaptation becomes a survival strategy.

But this very adjustment comes at a price. The daughter loses access to herself. At some point, she no longer knows what she feels, what she wants, or what she needs. Her inner compass is overshadowed by her mother’s needs—and thus begins a life that often feels empty, strange, or wrong.

Emotional loneliness despite closeness

From the outside, these mother-child relationships sometimes appear completely normal. They spend time together, do things together, and are in regular contact.

But the emotional quality of the relationship is often shockingly poor. Conversations revolve around the mother—her problems, her successes, her opinions.

When the daughter tries to share something personal, she is interrupted, downplayed, or ignored—subtly but consistently. Her inner world remains unnoticed.

Her vulnerability finds no space. And so a feeling of deep, invisible loneliness arises: I am alone—even though I am not alone.

The daughter’s guilt

Many daughters of self-centered mothers carry severe feelings of guilt. They believe they are ungrateful if they complain about their mother.

They hear inside: She did everything for you! And yes—that’s often true on a material or organizational level. But love is more than provision. And emotional neglect is no small matter.

Nevertheless, many find it difficult to acknowledge their anger. Instead, the pain often turns inward, manifesting in self-doubt, depression, psychosomatic complaints, or a constant feeling of “I’m wrong.”

Growing up – and still being tied down

Even in adulthood, these dynamics don’t automatically resolve. Even if the daughter moves out—even if she has children of her own—the patterns remain.

The mother constantly checks in, expecting closeness, recognition, and influence. Or she withdraws, offended, when her daughter sets boundaries.

And the daughter? She feels guilty. She’s torn between the desire for distance and the old need to please her mother.

It often takes years for her to realize: I am allowed to live my life—even if my mother doesn’t like it.

The path to healing: Back to yourself

Healing begins with recognition—with the courage to honestly look at what was, and what is. Without sugarcoating.
Without self-judgment. It’s not about hating your mother. It’s about taking your own story seriously.

This includes:

• Name what’s missing: Love that was conditional. Attention that wasn’t directed at you, but at the image you were supposed to fulfill.

• Let go of the blame: You didn’t do anything wrong. As a child, you did what you could to survive.

• Acknowledge your feelings: Anger, sadness, disappointment—they’re legitimate, and they need space to release.

• Set new boundaries: You can decide how much closeness you want. You no longer have to conform.

Therapeutic support can be very helpful in this regard. Deeply ingrained patterns rarely resolve through insight alone. It takes time, self-compassion—and often, the nurturing of what was missing.

What you can win

When you begin to detach yourself from the self-centered mother, you regain something very precious: yourself.

• You learn to recognize your own needs—and to respect them.

• You discover what you really feel—regardless of the reaction of others.

• You strengthen your self-esteem—not through conformity, but through authenticity.

• You can build relationships based on reciprocity—not one-sidedness.

The path to this goal isn’t easy. It’s often painful, confusing, and full of setbacks. But it’s possible. And it’s worth it.

Conclusion: You were never too sensitive – you were alone

The daughter of a self-centered mother often carries the pain of not having been truly seen, not having been truly cared for, for years.

She grows up in an emotional vacuum—with a smile on her face and an empty heart.

But this story doesn’t have to determine your entire life.
You are allowed to free yourself.
You are allowed to let go of what was never yours.
You are allowed to stop fighting for a love that never truly nourished you.

Because you’re not fake. You’re not too sensitive.
You’re a human being with a deep need for genuine connection—and that’s exactly what makes you strong.

The post The Lonely Daughter Of A Self-centered Mother appeared first on Pregnancy+Parenting.

So let me make this easier for you.

This isn’t just another hospital bag checklist — this is the one I wish I had when I was expecting my first, second, and even third. It’s simple, it’s mama-tested, and it covers the real essentials — for you, your baby, and your partner — without the clutter. Because honestly? You don’t need everything. You just need the right things. And I’m so excited for you, because your baby — the one you’ve waited so long for — is almost here. Let’s get you packed and ready to meet them.

What Mama Really Needs: Comfort, Care & Confidence

Mama, this part is all about you. Yes — you, the one who’s grown this little miracle for the past nine months. As much as the focus quickly shifts to the baby (and rightfully so!), your comfort and peace of mind matter just as much — especially during labor and those first few hours after birth.

Here are the true essentials that will help you feel a little more at home, a little more in control, and a lot more cared for:

• Comfortable nightgown or maternity robe – Something soft and easy to nurse in, if you plan to breastfeed. Bonus if it makes you feel a bit cute, too!

• Nursing bra & high-waisted underwear – Trust me, comfort is key. Go for stretchy, breathable fabrics.

• Maternity pads or adult diapers – The hospital may provide some, but having your own preferred brand can make all the difference.

• Toiletries that feel like you – Think face wash, lip balm, a small moisturizer, maybe even a travel-size dry shampoo. A little freshness can lift your mood more than you expect.

• Phone + long charging cable – You’ll be updating family, snapping baby’s first photos, or maybe just listening to your favorite surah or playlist while you rest.

• Snacks you love – After labor, you’ll be hungry. Pack a few of your favorite treats or easy-to-eat energy bars.

• Going-home outfit – Choose something comfy, loose-fitting, and easy to slip on. Your body will still be in recovery mode — give it grace.

You don’t need to overpack, mama. Think of this as your little comfort kit — a way to nurture yourself as you step into this incredible next chapter. You’ve carried this baby with love. Now, let’s care for you, too.

Tiny But Mighty: Essentials for Your Newborn Baby

Now let’s talk about your little bundle — the one who’s been growing, hiccupping, and flipping inside you all these months. Packing for your baby can feel so special, like you’re finally preparing to meet the person you’ve been dreaming of. But here’s a gentle reminder: babies don’t need much at the beginning — just warmth, comfort, and you.

Here’s what I’ve learned to pack after bringing two little ones into the world:

• 2–3 Newborn onesies or sleepers – Choose soft, easy-to-snap outfits. Zippers are your best friend in those early diaper changes!

• A cozy swaddle or baby blanket – Hospitals can be chilly. Bring something warm, soft, and familiar.

• Newborn diapers & wipes – Some hospitals provide these, but I always packed a few of my own just in case.

• Mittens, socks, and a tiny hat – Their skin is delicate, and babies lose heat quickly. These little pieces help keep them snug.

• Burp cloths or muslin squares – Spit-ups happen. These are lifesavers.

• Going-home outfit – Pick something adorable, but practical too (easy to change, weather-appropriate, and comfy).

• Car seat (installed and ready to go) – Most hospitals won’t let you leave without it. Make sure it’s set up ahead of time

Don’t Forget Dad (or Your Birth Partner!)

In the swirl of preparing for baby’s arrival, it’s easy to forget that your partner needs a few essentials too — especially if they’ll be staying with you at the hospital. They’re your support system, your hand-holder, your snack-fetcher, and maybe even your photographer when those first magical moments happen. A little preparation for them goes a long way.

Here’s what I lovingly pack (or remind my husband to pack!) every time:

• • Change of clothes (or two!) – Something comfy for sleeping, and maybe a fresh shirt for going home.

  • Toiletries – Toothbrush, deodorant, face wash — trust me, everyone feels better after freshening up.

  • Snacks & water bottle – Labor can be long. Having their own stash of food keeps them energized (and out of your snack bag!).

  • Phone & charger – So they can take photos, update family, and set alarms for diaper duty later on.

  • Cash or card – Just in case they need to grab coffee, parking, or anything you forgot.

  • A small pillow or blanket – Hospital chairs aren’t known for comfort, and a little coziness goes a long way.

The “Nice to Have” Extras That Can Make a Big Difference

While the essentials are all you really need, there are a few little extras that aren’t must-haves — but can bring so much comfort, ease, or even a touch of joy in those unforgettable hours at the hospital.

As a mom who’s done this more than once, these are the thoughtful additions I’ve packed over the years that made my experience just a little more peaceful, a little more me:

• • • Your own pillow or blanket – Hospital pillows are… well, not home. Having something that smells like your bed can help you rest better.

    • Essential oils or a calming room spray – If you’ve used them during pregnancy, they can bring a familiar, grounding feeling during labor.

    • Bluetooth speaker or headphones – Soft recitations, soothing duas, or your favorite playlist can truly change the atmosphere of the room.

    • Small journal or notebook – Jotting down birth details, your baby’s first moments, or even a quick dua can turn into memories you’ll treasure.

    • Lip balm & face mist – Labor can be long and dry! These tiny luxuries can feel like a little spa break in the middle of it all.

    • Extra bag for gifts or hospital freebies – Trust me, you’ll leave with more than you came with.

Last-Minute Tips Before You Zip That Bag Shut

You’re almost there, mama — your bag is packed, your heart is full, and your little one is so close to being in your arms. Before you zip that bag shut and place it by the door (or in the car!), here are a few gentle reminders from one mom to another:

• • • • Pack early, but not too early – Around 35–36 weeks is perfect. It gives you peace of mind without rushing.

      • Keep important documents handy – Your ID, insurance card, and hospital paperwork should go in an outside pocket or a small folder.

      • Label baby’s things – It makes things easier for your partner or the nurses when it’s time to grab that going-home outfit or extra diaper.

      • Double-check the car seat – Make sure it’s installed properly and adjusted for a newborn. It’s one less thing to worry about later.

      • Let your bag reflect you – Whether it’s adding your favorite lip gloss, a small journal, or a photo that brings you comfort — this is your moment. Make it yours.

      • Don’t aim for perfect — aim for peace – No hospital bag is ever packed “perfectly.” And that’s okay. You already have what your baby needs most: you.

The post Hospital Bag Essentials: The Only List You’ll Ever Need appeared first on Pregnancy+Parenting.

In this article, we will explain the benefits of first walker shoes and give you some tips on what to look for to give your child the best possible start to walking.

Why are first walker shoes so important?

First-walking shoes provide a stable base and support for your child’s tiny feet. While learning to walk, it’s important that your child’s feet are properly supported to prevent injuries and foot malformation. First-walking shoes can help promote good foot positioning and a healthy gait.

The advantages of first walker shoes

1. Promote healthy foot development : First walker shoes provide the necessary support to ensure correct foot positioning and good foot health.
2. Protection from injuries : The sturdy soles of first-walker shoes protect your child’s feet from sharp objects and rough surfaces.
3. Improve balance : With the proper support and stability that first walker shoes provide, your child can better develop their sense of balance.
4. Promotes self-confidence : By giving your child the right shoes, you help them develop confidence in their abilities, leading to faster and safer movement.

What should you look for when buying first walker shoes?

The right fit

A good fit is crucial for your child’s comfort and foot health. Make sure the shoes offer enough room for the toes and aren’t too tight.

A good tip is to leave about half a centimeter of space between the longest toe and the end of the shoe.

Flexibility and stability

First-walking shoes should have a certain degree of flexibility to allow for the foot’s natural movement. At the same time, it’s important that they are stable enough to provide support and security for your child.

Breathable material

A breathable material such as leather or textile fabric is important to avoid sweating and the associated skin irritation.

Make sure that the first walker shoes are made of a high-quality, breathable material.

Non-slip soles

To prevent falls and injuries, first-walking shoes should have non-slip soles. Rubber soles are generally a good choice, as they provide good grip on various surfaces while also being durable.

Easy to put on and take off

First walker shoes should be easy to put on and take off to help little ones learn to walk independently and save you time and effort.

Shoes with Velcro fasteners or elastic laces are practical and also offer a good fit.

The best first walker shoe brands

There are many brands of first walkers on the market, but some are particularly known for their quality, comfort, and support. Some of the best brands for first walkers include:

1. Bisgaard: Known for their handmade shoes made from high-quality materials, Bisgaard offers a wide range of first-walking shoes in different designs and colors.
2. Ricosta: With a long tradition in children’s shoe manufacturing, Ricosta is a trusted brand that offers first-step shoes with excellent fit and support.
3. Superfit: Superfit offers first-walking shoes with a combination of functionality and fashionable design that appeal to both parents and children.
4. Bobux: Bobux is a New Zealand brand specializing in innovative and sustainable children’s shoes . Their first walkers are known for their flexibility and fit.
5. Primigi: The Italian brand Primigi has been producing high-quality children’s shoes for over 40 years and offers a wide range of first-step shoes in various styles.

First walker shoes for every step of development

It’s important to choose first-walker shoes that are appropriate for your child’s developmental stage. Soft shoes with flexible soles are suitable for babies just learning to crawl. Once your child begins to stand upright and take their first steps, they’ll need more stable shoes with more grip and support.

Step by step into running pleasure

First-walking shoes are an important part of your child’s development as they explore the world on their own feet. With the right fit, flexibility, breathability, and grip, first-walking shoes help your child build confidence and promote healthy foot development.

Make sure you choose high-quality shoes and cater to your child’s needs to ensure a successful and enjoyable learning experience.

The post First-walking Shoes For Babies: How To Support Your Child’s First Steps appeared first on Pregnancy+Parenting.

It is therefore important to understand the key aspects of development in the third year of life and to know how parents can support their children during this crucial phase.

The importance of the 3rd year of life

Physical development

At this age, a child’s physical skills develop rapidly. Children learn to walk, climb, and jump, and their fine motor skills improve. Parents should encourage their child to explore their surroundings and practice their physical skills.

Cognitive development

A child’s cognitive development in their third year is characterized by curiosity and a desire to learn. Children begin to understand complex concepts and solve simple problems. They also develop better memories and can remember routines.

Social and emotional development

The third year is an important time for the development of social and emotional skills. Children begin to develop empathy and compassion and learn to recognize and regulate their own emotions and those of others. They also develop their social skills by learning to interact with peers and form friendships.

Key factors for the 3rd year of life

Environment and bonding

A safe and loving environment is crucial for a child’s healthy development in their third year. A strong bond with parents or caregivers gives the child security and self-confidence.

Parents should therefore ensure that they create a trusting and supportive atmosphere for their child.

Communication and language

In their third year, children make great strides in language development. They expand their vocabulary, form longer sentences, and learn to express themselves.

Parents should talk to their children a lot, read to them and give them the opportunity to speak and communicate themselves.

Independence and self-confidence

Children in their third year develop an increasing need for independence and self-confidence. They want to try things out for themselves and make decisions.

Parents can encourage this by encouraging their children to make their own decisions and take responsibility for small tasks.

The right diet

Healthy eating habits

A balanced and healthy diet is particularly important in the third year of life as it supports the child’s growth and development.

Parents should make sure to offer their child a variety of nutrient-rich foods and encourage healthy eating habits.

Food variety and balance

A varied and balanced diet ensures that the child receives all the necessary nutrients.

Parents should make sure to offer their child fruits, vegetables, grains, dairy products, proteins and healthy fats every day.

The importance of sleep

Sleep patterns and needs

Children in their third year of life need sufficient sleep to recover physically and mentally.

Parents should ensure that their child has regular sleep times and gets sufficient sleep.

Effects of sleep deprivation

Lack of sleep can lead to health problems, irritability, difficulty concentrating and behavioral problems in children.

Parents should therefore take their child’s sleep needs seriously and seek professional help if sleep problems occur.

Physical activity and exercise

Promoting physical activity in everyday life

Regular physical activity is essential for the healthy development of children in their third year of life.

Parents should make sure to provide their child with daily opportunities for exercise and outdoor play .

Benefits of physical activity

Physical activity not only promotes physical health but also the cognitive and social development of children. Exercise improves motor skills, self-confidence, and social behavior.

Creativity and play

Meaning of the game

Play is crucial for the healthy development of children in their third year of life. Through play, children explore their environment, develop their imagination, and learn to interact with others.

Promoting creativity

Parents can encourage their children’s creativity by offering them a variety of play materials and opportunities and giving them space for imaginative play.

Social interaction and friendships

Development of social skills

In the third year of life, children learn to find their way in social situations and to interact with others.

Parents should support their child in developing their social skills by providing opportunities for interaction with peers.

Building friendships

Friendships are important for the social and emotional development of children in their third year of life.

Parents should encourage their child to make and maintain friendships.

Education and support

Appreciation and patience

A loving and patient approach is crucial for the healthy development of children in their third year of life.

Parents should show appreciation and understanding to their child, even if it can be challenging at times.

Setting limits and consequences

Children in their third year of life must learn that their actions have consequences.

Parents should set clear boundaries for their child and enforce appropriate consequences when necessary.

Health

Preventive examinations

Regular check-ups remain important during the third year of life to monitor the child’s healthy development and detect potential problems early on.

In Germany, there are ten preventive examinations for babies and toddlers, the so-called “U-examinations.” The U7a is the first in the third year of life.

vaccinations

Vaccinations are an important part of healthcare for babies and young children. They protect against serious diseases and strengthen the immune system.

The 3rd year of life: Important findings and recommendations

The third year of life is a crucial phase in a child’s development. Parents should be aware of the various aspects of development and ensure that they provide their child with optimal support and encouragement during this important time.

FAQs

How do I promote my child’s language development in their third year?

Talk to your child a lot, read to them and give them the opportunity to speak and communicate on their own.

How can I help my third-year child develop healthy eating habits?

Offer a balanced and varied diet and make sure to enjoy meals together in a relaxed atmosphere.

How much sleep does my child need in their third year?

Children in their third year of life usually need about 10-13 hours of sleep per day, including a nap.

How can I support my third-year child in developing social skills?

Give your child opportunities to interact with peers, e.g. by attending playgroups, kindergartens or group activities.

How do I encourage my child’s physical activity in their third year?

Offer your child daily opportunities to exercise and play outdoors, and make sure you set an active example yourself.

The post The 3rd Year: Nutrition, Sleep And Activities For Toddlers appeared first on Pregnancy+Parenting.